Should You Consider Dating Someone Older than You?
Older guys are known to have more maturity, better communication skills, and knowledge about making a young girl feel happy. There are so many reasons why you would see women interested in dating someone 30 years older. For many, it is more like finding that energy between the two. Just like magnets, the opposites attract. It could be one of many reasons, but there might as well be childhood issues at play too.
Girls with daddy issues are more likely to enjoy dating someone 25 years older. And of course, some teen girls seem mature and older than their real age, making them feel attracted to older guys who have their act together better than the average young guy. After all, a guy who drives an old car and shares his apartment with a couple of other dudes is never going to be as appealing as the man who is financially stable and carries himself with more maturity and confidence.
An important consideration is how confident you are about establishing a relationship with an older guy. This relationship can often bring up feelings of insecurity. An older-younger relationship should make you feel empowered, so go ahead if it makes you feel good and genuinely excited to be around your older dating partner. Also, remember that older guys won't always fall for anyone – they need to feel that a relationship with you is rejuvenating for them. There needs to be an exciting spark that past experiences may have bogged down. Ensure that the guy you choose is open and flexible and somewhat ready to explore new romantic opportunities.
So, age is less likely to define your relationship when the connection is right. It will be nothing more than another number in the crazy numbers game.
Is Dating Men 20 Years Older a Good Idea?
Older, younger relationships are exciting and are about how much you love each other. So, the answer to "Is it wrong to date someone 20 years older than you?" is "No."
However, people think differently, and there are many challenges you have to overcome when you are contemplating the idea of dating someone 20 years older than you. As a legal adult, you can marry an older guy if you want, but you should still consider laws about the age of consent. A very large age gap often makes you a bit less compatible long term. If you are in your 20's and the guy you want to marry is in his 40's, it may sound okay physically. He may still be good in bed, but you may have a huge communication gap to fulfill. Things change considerably when you are 35, and the man is 55. That is where you may notice disproportion in libidos.
A huge age difference may also play a role when you plan to stay together on a long-term basis. He may slow down a lot earlier, may not be able to travel, carry heavy luggage, and have much sex. But, it may be okay for short-term dating, so long as you make your intentions clear and maintain a power balance in the relationship. If you are young and he is middle-aged, he may be stable and have a lot more money than you. It shifts the power paradigm in his favor, which may hurt you in many ways.
Try dating someone with a 20-year age difference only if you are also mature enough to give what it takes to nourish a relationship. You will also grow as a person, and what seems exciting and attractive right now may lose its luster over time. Be prepared to deal with different circumstances than you might have anticipated a few years ago.
Is Dating Someone 8 Years Older a Good Idea?
Is an 8-year age difference too much to have a fulfilling relationship? Of course, not. In fact, you can hear from people who say, "My boyfriend is 30 years older than me" or "my friend is 20 years older than me," but they seem to have a perfect relationship. Dating someone 5 years older or even 8 years older should not be a problem so long as you have shared dreams, life goals, values, and vision. You and your boyfriend should have the important stuff in common to make your relationship as fulfilling as possible.
There can be occasional glitches but nothing you cannot manage. He might not be able to get your 90's hip-hop references, and you might miss his 80's pop-culture references, but it should not bother you if you "get" each other on other important stuff. A great relationship is the one that builds you up, and a mature guy can certainly lend a helping hand.
Dating someone 8 years older also means you both bring something different to the table. You bring your energy with you. You may be a little sassy, but your upbeat attitude is distinct. Whereas your older partner will bring some maturing with him, that will help maintain a balance and make life worth living for both of you.
While there is nothing bad or wrong about dating a guy 8 years older than you, you should not automatically assume that maturity comes with age. Even an older guy may have no clue how to treat a girl how she wants to be treated. So, take your time before you decide anything about your future.
Remember Few Tips on Dating an Older Guy
So you are looking for a mature guy to date, or you are already dating a guy 30 years older. You are now head over heels, infatuated with one another and enjoying your life like never before. Well, it might change when you eventually deal with the reality and introduce your newfound love to your friends and family. You may find yourself answering so many questions about your reasons to choose a much older husband, and it can be daunting to deal with all this. Here are a few tips to bear in mind to make dating an older guy a more enriching experience:
- It makes great sense to educate yourself a little about the era your boyfriend grew up in. Google will come to your rescue. Do some research, and you might enjoy some of the TV shows and popular music from those days.
- Be prepared to deal with some awkward questions when you eventually meet each other's family. Do not feel offended if someone takes you as a gold digger. There may be all sorts of questions that hit you hard, but you can handle that bombardment better if you come prepared. Do not let those "people" throw you off balance.
- Learn to keep your calm when people discuss your relationship. No matter what you do, your relationship will be the hot "gossip" for some time, at least. Stay calm and know that it will settle when some other drama arises. Do not take those comments to heart, as it is their "way" to deal with the whole thing. They won't change – and you do not have to, either.
- Know what makes you feel attracted to him. You will often have to shed some light on what you see in him. Even if it feels like writing a mission statement, do it and learn it off by heart. Whether you like his good manners or you appreciate courtesy in him, or you simply crave the stability that only a mature man can emotionally offer you, be clear about it and say it. Do not try to be funny by saying you are after him because of his money because his friends and family are not going to appreciate it at all.
- Be prepared to accept him with all his baggage. Dating 30 years older guy means he may have been in a relationship in the past. He may have an ex or children. You will have to accept him with his former life. Do not feel jealous when he talks about his ex or his children. For those prone to jealously, such relationships are not going to prove very fulfilling.
- You do not have to change your personality to look mature or older than you truly are. He may be in love with you for your vitality and energy. Do not stop or scold yourself even if you behave in an immature way at times. You should reach out and encourage him to take part in activities you love. He will love it and be over-the-moon for making him feel young again.
Dating an older guy can be challenging in many ways, and it is important not to panic. Doing a little homework will help you avoid feeling caught out later. Feel confident and stand by what you believe is right, and your relationship will continue to bring in more happiness for you.
Few Reasons Why Get in a Relationship with Older Men
You may have a friend living happily with a boyfriend 20 years older. Many people believe that age is just a number and how you feel about each other is all that matters. There is a long list of reasons why young women want to be in a relationship with a much older guy. For instance:
- One of the many perks of dating an older guy is that he will be much more experienced in life. You can learn a thing or two from them. They may have already made and corrected so many mistakes that you are yet to make. They have no problem taking the lead and help you reach the next level. As they are experienced, they are usually more confident too, which makes them mature and attractive.
- Their better communication skills can beat younger guys any time who usually have issues crafting the right words to express their feelings for you. Mature guys would never ignore their partners because they have learned how important good listening skills are to help a relationship thrive.
- Financial and emotional stability are other important reasons why it makes sense to date an older man. No, you are not a gold digger if you wish to date a guy with a nice job and a stable income. Older men usually earn more money because of their experience in their respective fields. They also know how to invest and spend wisely. They would not play emotional games either or have unrealistic expectations from a relationship.
- Older guys are stable, experience, and never afraid of commitments. They know what their life goals are, and they are very sure about your place in their lives. As they have seen the hard days, they are more prepared to have a meaningful relationship with you.
- Contrary to popular belief, older men can be extremely passionate and skilled in the bedroom. Of course, it depends how old the guy is, but expect them to know a few tricks to please a woman sexually.
Truly, it can be an amazing experience to date a mature older guy. You can find a girl who says, "my boyfriend is 25 years older than me, but we are happy together." It may work for you, too, but do not play games, plan everything wisely, and acknowledge his emotional baggage. Getting in the way of his responsibilities is never a great idea, either. Being mature, he is likely to have his own business or a job with serious responsibilities. Do not feel bad if you find him work above and beyond what is considered normal. Learn to deal with it, and your relationship will prosper irrespective of your age gap.